The days pass,
without me doing anything,
its just routine that I accomplish, but I am stuck with my emotions,
feeling dizzy and you just have to listen to those inner needs
that let me sleep, eat and go again for the same,
I just sit and walk to a place and back.
Makes depressed for so long to do nothing not even finishing any good.
My hand moves with a pencil between the fingers but what is written has no meaning,
When the sun comes out sometimes, I glance towards the shine
smiling because life seem so beautiful then,
only though I cannot do anything with this beauty,
like a functioning body without a heart to love- what sense does it make then to live at all?
I wonder how I can be grateful for every day I get once again a new,
I see the time and think how much I will use what I have
Only at the end of each day I fall desperately asleep, tears say,
I am incapable to do anything that gives me sense of purpose
How can I make a change, when everyday I am bound to duties from around
My mind is empty, my head is too,
I just feel desire for something to do
It’s hard to work on what inhabits, but time does not give me enough space to live life fully
Though I don’t know where I leave the seconds that I seem to have
Make a plan, I suggest to myself
But there seems to be nothing so intense
What Is valuable to you, what is bothering you
Like the wish to be just healthy
Not feel pain and emptiness,
Is this more than allowed to desire?
With my voice I beg into the night
May the pain be freed
May love arise
Still, no question answered with what to occupy myself,
Stupid automatic moves, that shall just make go the time
Not ever do I want to trash my mind with that,
The second I vow,
I know that I will have to..